royalteens: i swear i’d dress better but i’m poor and fat
bombliate: how weird is it to have pets though like a random animal just lives in your house and you can’t communicate with it but you both just accept it
esexist: there is a thin line between being sassy and being an asshole and i cross it everyday
twiistz: i met a girl with 12 nipples sounds funny dozen tit
bluebeanze: friendship is so weird??? Like it starts out with compliments and cute things and then suddenly it does a complete 360 and you just start screaming at them and calling them motherfucker
footmeetsface: spoon-party-of-bombur: multipack: amyeatfeast: stopthatitssilly: alexkisu: multipack: f is for friends who do stuff without you u is for uninvited c is for clinging onto hope that you wont keep getting forgotten k is for krispy kreme yum this is not what i wanted this post to turn out like one time i got in the shower and came out and no one was home and the...
striderfeels: trashboat: could you imagine being on tumblr with all your followers physically present just like a group of 300 people standing around staring at you and every time you say anything a handful of them just repeat it to eachother for a few minutes the internet is a strange place
swifty-swoop: if your school has an anime club do not attend
mew-squared: In 2009, a man married a video game character In 2007, a woman married the Eiffel Tower In 2008, a man married a life-sized doll Also in 2009, a woman married a roller coaster And in 2005, a woman married a dolphin please explain to me why people still say that gays shouldnt be able to be married to preserve the sanctity of marraige
fagdral: theanti90smovement: Obama was born August 4, 1961??? very fishy…….August+4+1+96+1=420. 420? this is no coincidence Barack won’t be able to sweet talk his way out of this one. I ACTUALLY OPENED MY COMPUTER CALCULATOR TO SEE IF August+4+1+96+1=420 REALLY EQUALED 420 BEFORE REALIZING THAT AUGUST IS NOT A NUMBER
crumzinmahlap: did it hurt? when u fell from someones butt into the toilet water u piece of shit
hawkenchilada: dragon age just gets me on a real emotional level
spainstateofmind: thebadwolf: Fun party trick: put Skittles and M&M’s in the same bowl, wait for someone to grab a handful. you can go fuck yourself
kawaiians: if i were a caterpillar i would probably emerge from my cocoon as another slightly fatter caterpillar
When women scream you wonder what’s wrong with them. When men yell you get...– A girl in my creative writing class said this in response to a story we read about witnessing intimate partner violence and it really fucked with my head because I’ve never, ever, ever, thought of it that way. (via youngbadmanbrown)
iamtonysexual: jonandtheon: jonandtheon: jonandtheon: MY BOOK IS LOCKED IN A CLASSROOMN RED ASLERT I TOLD THIS REALLY NICE KID WHO NEVER CAUSES TROUBLE AND HEREACHED INTO HIS BACKPACK AND PULLED OUT A KEYCHAIN WITH KEYS TO THE CLASSROOM AND UNLOCKED IT FOR ME?? update i asked him why he had those keys and he said “its not important” im so lost He’ll be vital to your quest later,...
qgirlthesalacious: interwar: do you ever just look at children of couples in films or television shows and go no you are genetically impossible that is not a dominant allele we are too damn smart
This is what Yahoo paid $1.1 Billion for.
halfdeadands0alive: froggyflan: I will never understand people who think Tinkerbell is cute and girly and innocent like Have you ever seen Peter Pan She tries to MURDER WENDY MURDER also she’s a jealous monster why is all her merchandise flowery and completely opposite to her personality and in the original book she “swears like a sailor”
breadboxes: breadboxes: what did vincent say when he lost his car in the parking lot “where did my van gogh”
peasantbutts: if google isn’t your search engine i don’t trust you
kawaii-santa-chan: kawaii-santa-chan: kawaii-santa-chan: there is no teacher in my history class rn and we are all just sitting here and being really quiet and whenever somebody opens the door, everyone turns around because we think its a sub but its not and then we just shush whoever walks in update: we’re taking attendance and sending it down so nobody suspects that we dont have a...